The Porn Pay-Per-View Network

When it comes to hot porn action, many people focus on the hot porn and sometimes neglect to notice the action. We sat down with Nigel McWolfe, a world renowned fight coordinator and choreographer for many of the best porn videos of all time. He’s here to talk about the many dazzling stories of his career. McWolfe has been doing fight choreography for most of his life, before retiring at the young age of 35 to pursue other endeavors, like writing.

“It has been a wild, amazing ride for me” exclaims McWolfe with nearly a teary eyed expression. “I feel like I’ve really established myself in the porn industry. I’m very thankful for the last several years, for being just part of the business in that capacity.”

McWolfe is a former stuntman that went into fight choreography after a near fatal accident. His first few gigs were for some low budget action movies. During one of these jobs, he was approached by the lead actor, who actually does some porn work on the side, and offered McWolfe a stint at a porno he was doing. At first McWolfe was reluctant, but he soon fell in love with the usiness and decided to stay.

“At first I didn’t think that there’d be enough jobs for me, but I was obviously wrong. Like most people, I didn’t appreciate the other aspects of the porn industry, and I didn’t even know that any of them had any fight scenes. Now, I tell everyone I meet that the best porn videos have awesome fight scenes!” McWolfe’s body of work is not a fancy as some of his Hollywood counterparts, but McWolfe had learned to do the best with a smaller budget. “If the director knows what he’s doing, then I wouldn’t have to worry. And I’m proud to say that I’ve worked with the best directors ever, and I noticed that none of them are doing mainstream movies!”

McWolfe has just finished writing his memoirs, and he’s hoping to get it published. He says it contains many amazing stories about the porn industry as well as some of the celebrities he has had the pleasure of working with, as a stuntman and as a choreographer. While still looking for a publisher, McWolfe has already wasted no time trying to promote the book. “My life is full of anecdotes, and I’m sure that anyone would find my memoirs a great read.”

A porn company with a unique production theme is going to be launched in the middle of next year. This porn production outfit promises that they will deliver high quality porn at par with their competitors, with one characteristic. This company will be producing only holiday themed adult porn videos. This production outfit is tentatively named Hallmark Porn.

Aaron Styles, head of Hallmark Porn, discusses the very concept of the production outfit. “Porn is a yearly four billion dollar business. What does that mean to us? It means that there are lots of people out there who like porn. Chances are, the person beside you right now is an avid porn viewer. So, with that in mind, what do you think is the level of probability that a person who would receive porn as a gift who like and appreciate it? Pretty high, right? That’s what we want to do here at Hallmark Porn. We want to create not only quality adult movies that all fans of the medium would enjoy, but also something festive and ideal as gifts.”

The company is now currently in production of several films. While the company is set to officially launch in the middle of next year, they are already working diligently on a Christmas themed video for this year. “Hopefully, Mrs. Claus Goes to Town would hit the video stores and the web sites before Christmas Day itself. We are also in the production stage of Auld Lang Cock, or offering for the upcoming New Year.”

Other of their projects include Teenage Trick or Treat, a Halloween special that shows naughty teenagers in hot costumes trick or treating and having sex. Naughty Easter Egg Hunt is obviously a tribute to the great tradition with a sexy twist. Plymouth Fuck is a porn tat features a very unique re-imagining of the history of Thanksgiving. This Styles reveled is Hallmark’s most ambitious project. Shot on location and with a rather sizeable budget, Plymouth Fuck will be the company’s initial crown jewel of holiday offerings.

“Our projects will not only be about the major holidays. We are going for every holiday possible. We are going to be as non-denominational as possible. In development are Kwanzaa and Hanukkah movies, and we will also be producing ones for Asian Holidays, most likely Chinese New Year. Hallmark Porn is definitely set on making an impact in the upcoming year. I personally, am very excited.”

It is a general conception that watching porn is a singular activity, or something one generally does alone. A new social networking site plans to shatter that conception by connecting the world’s porn fans in one porn happy community. In fact, the tentative name of the site itself is porn happy community. The developer of the site, a young man by the name of David Fleer, hopes to create a community that would make porn fans feel comfortable with their porn watching.

“There has always been a taint of shame for porn fanatics.” explains Fleer, who himself is going to be an active member of the site he’s trying to create, much like the “Tom” guy from MySpace. “IN my site, that shame will somehow be erased. This is a social networking site that allows fans to appreciate the art of porn without fear of judgments and any of the negative stuff that society has put porn under. They can post pictures of themselves, pretty much declare tot he world not just the fact that they love porn, but why, and what kind, and people would be genuinely interested.”

Fleer says the idea came to him one night while drinking with his friends and in a state of drunkenness the discussion turned to porn. Each of his friends was complaining about how being caught with porn in the street or the video store was very embarrassing, and how their boyfriends or girlfriends would find porn in the computers and it would be a big fight. Despite all those hassles, no one is going to stop watching porn, Fleer deduced, and he determined that he was going to do something about it.

One of the unique traits of the site, according to Fleer, is that it gives members the ability to upload porn videos, be it amateur or professional. “I’m still working out the kinks, especially with copyright laws and such. I don’t want to step on toes here, especially not from anyone in the porn industry.”

Fleer calls the site his contribution to the world. “I view it as some kind of legacy that I could leave behind. I know that people will go to the site not knowing and caring who it is that created it, but seeing my fellow porn brethren interacting with each other, finding a place online where they know they truly belong, is enough for me.”

The market is changing. With the economy on a very bad state, many people are pursuing some of their seemingly inessential passions through non-conventional means. There has been a prolific use of hot porn videos as a substitute for currency in certain circles around the world. The search for and exchange of such goods have become increasingly widespread that porn is now slowly becoming the equivalent of cigarettes in prison in terms of market use.

Regarded by many as collectibles, porn videos have developed somewhat a constant state of motion when it comes to the frequency of how it circulates and changes hands. Many use their porn collection as a means of trading with other collectors for their own porn videos, and a porn videos have been used several times to barter for other products.

Said one eager porn collector, “I’ve been using my videos to acquire other porn videos that I like, which isn’t a new thing. Recently I’ve discovered that there’s a lot of demand when it comes to porn, and I’ve managed to use it to build up my comic book and action figure collection without even having to spend any real money!”

Many consumers echo this statement, and with the production of new porn videos nearly on a daily basis, it seems like porn is one effective alternative to spending money. Many are even trying to develop a pricing guide for these videos, in order to get a standard set of determining a video’s value. “The rarer it is, it definitely will be worth more. The age of the video, the quality, and even the medium tends to affect the value. Like say, you have a copy of a sex video that everyone has been able to download, that’s pretty much worthless. But if you have it on DVD, what with the extra features and the packaging, that’s going to hike up its value. But let’s say you have a downloaded copy of a porno that no one has been able to get, then it would also be worth nearly as much as an original DVD.What fetches the most value are those that feature the sickest, most unconventional stuff, like genuine scat. Those are very hard to find”

If this trend continues, and there are no indicators showing that it will not, porn videos would become a very sound investment in the years to come. Many people are already stacking up, downloading every porn video they would think fetches a huge amount.

It’s one of the age old questions that many individuals have pondered. What is the best way to watch adult content? Is a porn download much more ideal to streaming video? Are streaming sites preferable to having to download your porn? We examine the pros and cons of the two methods in attempt to figure out what truly is the best way to watch porn.

Let’s start with the content. Both methods of porn watching typically contain the same content. If it’s available on streaming, there is no reason to believe that the clip or movie is not downloadable. This notion of course does not work the other way around. A lot of times people use streaming sites to advertise certain movies, and you’ll have to download those movies to see the whole thing in its entirety. However, there are several cases wherein the people who download an entire porn movie discover that the best parts are already up for streaming, and they didn’t really miss much. This causes massive dissonance, especially if the content downloaded was not free.

The method in acquiring the porn is also a factor that affects the materials quality. Most people put up the best quality only for download, as video streaming does get a little slow if the video is of a higher quality. If not uploaded correctly, the streaming porn video would most likely be in a terrible condition.

Privacy is also another thing that should be taken into consideration. Porn and security go hand in hand. When it comes to porn, everyone becomes a veritable ninja, what with the sneakiness required and stuff. Streaming videos leave no trace evidence, especially if one knows how to cover his or her tracks, while downloading porn not only leaves evidence in the browser’s history but in the hard drive as well! And, if the video downloaded was from a questionable source, the danger of having your computer crash due to porn can be a tad embarrassing.

In conclusion, the answer to the age old question raised remains subjective. It depends on an individual needs and circumstances. Like say, if you were living alone, why would you have to be wary about privacy? In the end it is all up to the viewer to decide which medium is best for him or her. Remember though, to always use protection. Streaming or download, the Internet is still a Petri dish of viruses that can be damaging to your quality porn time.

Porn movies have changed dramatically over the past few decades. Sure, there’s still the variety of hardcore sex that has made porn movies extremely popular. But many believe the creative direction of porn has shifted dramatically. Instead of the old full length porn videos that had one encapsulating story, a lot of porn videos these days focus on a particular performer doing different things per scene. Many loyal fans are saddened by this trend.

One porn critic had an opinion regarding the matter. “True, porn is always about the sex scenes and the adult film stars. But those porn movies that actually have a story tend to be more effective in my book. Not only do they have the usual hardcore stuff, but the effective ones have a story that keeps the viewer engaged in every scene, thereby increasing a porn video’s effectiveness.”

Many fans and critics echo this observation. This recent decline in storied porn, according to some of the producers, is product of the continually dismal state of the world’s economy. “You think only TV and film writers were on strike?” asked Marv Whitman, a small time porn producer from Cobb County. “It’s hard to shell out money for a scriptwriter who’s going to write something for porn. The people watch to see pretty people have sex. That’s it. Erotica these days are too expensive.”

Many consider erotica as an essential part of the porn process, and Whitman’s comments have been rejected by many fans. An angry comment by one fan reveals that “We’re sick and tired of watching the pizza guy get laid over and over again by some big boobed bimbo? Where’s the material? These guys aren’t even trying anymore!” Whitman has nothing but disdain for fans who disapprove of straight up hardcore action.

“I’m a fan of porn myself, mind you, a big enough fan to actually pursue a career in it. And as a fan, I don’t give a rat’s ass if the hot chick is banging the pizza guy, the pool boy, the doctor or even a freaking priest! If it’s got a hot chick having sex and doing freaky things, I am always in! These people are hypocrites, not to mention a bit pretentious, expecting riveting storylines that they wouldn’t even pay attention to.”

No matter the issue, the number of feature length porn is on the decline, and the fans are clamoring for more.

The nefarious scheme behind fee porn or pay porn has been revealed. While the majority of the world seems uninfluenced by these pornographic materials, our sources confirm that the proliferation of paid porn is actually a part of a global conspiracy to thin out the human race to its more intelligent beings.

It is believed that the previous difficulties the world has been dealing with like wars and recession and sickness have all been due to one thing, and that cause is the rapid decline of education worldwide. Simply put, the human population has been getting dumber generation after generation. Despite the amazing leaps in technology, the majority of the worldwide populace is as dumb as ever, with IQs scoring an all time low. A secret organization has been formed to combat this threat, and porn is just their latest attempt to wipe out the human race’s intellectually inferior members.

Our reliable source, who was scared to death at the prospect of his identity being revealed, disclosed that this organization has started out carrying out their mission with subliminal messages from TV. These messages were designed to convince viewers to pursue more intellectual endeavors. However, their plan failed since the apparent dumbness of popular television over the past ten years has been too overpowering that the subliminal messages simply failed to penetrate.

The overwhelming influence of pop music also drowned out any attempts of this secret organization to improve the quality of life for all listeners, and at that point the organization decided to shift gears. Instead of getting the populace to get smarter, the organization deemed that it was just a matter of getting rid of the stupid folk that would ensure the intellectual longevity of the human race.

And that is where porn comes into the picture. Apparently the organization targeted fee porn because they consider the mediums audience the most dangerous types of people on Earth: stupid people with money. Poor stupid folk were easy to dispose of while rich stupid folk usually find themselves in positions of power and affect the direction of the entire world. Our source reported that the porn videos affect the minds of those who are considered to be, by the organization’s own classification, “intellectually unfit to live”. Secret messages from these porn videos actually start deteriorating the feeble mind, and with months of regular viewing, the brain just ceases to function.

So if you’re one of those jock types who use their looks and physique to breeze through academics… beware!

Living in a world where the global economy seemingly hangs on just by a thread, everyone is trying their best to save every penny they can. Even the fans of hardcore pornography are always on the look out for high quality adult entertainment without having as huge of a toll taken on these loyal audiences’ wallets. Our senior porn economics analyst Roger Von Bukes urges fans to enjoy the benefits of pay per minute porn movies.

Like the name suggests, pay per porn minute porn movies are a staple promo in most of the top porn websites on the Web today, charging viewers only for the actual minutes that the porn videos was being streamed. Von Bukes, this is the best way to enjoy porn without having the hassle of spending too much and regretting it later. Von Bukes main rationale for this is simple, he claims that the human biology ensures that his suggested course of action does save people money.

How? Why? It’s simple and pretty darn obvious. If an average man gets charged only for the actual amount of time he spends watching the porn video, and if it’s done so by the minute, then it would definitely be the most economical way the average man can watch porn. After all, the average man only watches porn to jerk off, and the average man ejaculates at around two to three minutes. That’s even less time spent than listening to your average song!

Complete satisfaction in just under three minutes. That is the power of masturbation and the driving force behind the success of these pay per minute movies. Von Bukes is so confident on this theory that he even experimented with it. He took two average guys who do not know each other and set them up in two different apartments in one building. Each man was given free internet porn memberships, one was signed up with one of those pay per minute programs, while the other as giving an important. After the two month mark both guys were asked for a very honest statement. Their statements were later corroborated with other data that was accumulated from each man’s respective computer, and yes, indeed, both men watched the same amount of porn. It’s just that one man paid for it in full while the other paid only for the good parts.

Von Bukes is pursuing further study, but is already urging people to save on porn.

A quiet afternoon was torn asunder by a riveting hostage crisis taking place in the normally peaceful town of Cleveland, Ohio. A middle aged unemployed man by the name of Henry Laughlin had snapped one morning and decided to hold two kids hostage in his rundown apartment. Miraculously, no one was hurt, and it was all thanks to the unlikely assist of online porn movies.

Laughlin had taken two of his neighbor’s kids, who he always had a friendly relationship with, hostage as he was screaming “bloody murder in the skies”. Laughlin, a former research assistant at the University of Cleveland was laid off a few months ago due to budget cuts and had been spending an “inordinate” amount of time watching the heavens with his telescope.

“That bastard threatened my kids” said the father Frank Robbins. “We’ve known him for years, treated him as one of our own, but I tell you, I’m gonna kill him the next time I see him!”

Other neighbors claim that Laughlin had never been more than docile. Even after losing his job a few weeks back, neighbors and other friends claim that Laughlin’s behavior never veered towards violence or did he display any form of depression or anxiety.

The day he took his neighbor’s kids hostage, Laughlin never offered any demands nor did he harm the children. The kids had revealed that all the while they had never felt threatened despite the fat that the hostage taker was wielding a gun. All the while, the suspect had just left the children to play with the computer, warning them to not set foot outside the apartment.

“He was very nice,” claimed Sheila, the seven year old hostage. “He said it wasn’t safe outside, and he was protecting us, and it was too late for daddy, who was already turned into an asshole.”

The situation was laid to rest when the SWAT team finally took down Laughlin. Laughlin lowered his guard after one of the hostages accidentally discovered a porn site, and was watching a porn video. Once the members of the SWAT team burst into the door Laughlin, did not bother putting up a fight.

In a chilling interview with the suspect, Laughlin reveals his newly developed dementia. “It’s all coming to an end. It’s an asshole epidemic. Everyone! Turning into assholes! Assholes I tell you! It’s in the sky! Look at the sky!”

At that point Laughlin had wet himself and let out a long and very maniacal laugh.

Many people admire the Japanese as a nation and as a people due to their countless contributions to the world. From their impeccable technology to the cultural landmarks such as the samurai, the Japanese have always been regarded as consistently being at the top of the proverbial global class. But one thing that truly sets Japan head and shoulders above the global competition is the undeniable quality of their porn. Truly, Japan has the best porn videos.

Their very presence in the porn industry has been nothing but years upon years of utter impact, changing the landscape of porn forever. From school girls with the short skirts to big, hulking men with tentacle penises, Japanese porn has taken sex movies into a whole new level. Should we expect little from the country that produced a certain Akira Kurosawa?

The term “bukkake” is obviously of Japanese descent, and it is a clear reflection of how bold the Japanese truly are, slinging their sperm towards unsuspecting female pedestrians or having a willing female take gallons, it seems, of sperm over her pretty face. Hentai has become so popular that it has evolved into a major part of geek culture, with its amazing animation, imaginative sex scenes and of course, out of the box storytelling.

Japanese porn is also lauded for their uber realistic depiction of rape and gang rape. The use of petite women and the image of having said women be taken by force by a number of healthy young men is the ultimate commentary of a male dominated nation such as Japan. In fact, there are fewer Japanese porn videos that feature the female lead as the sexual aggressor than otherwise.

When it comes to weird, Japanese porn not only crosses it, but does cartwheels all over the other side of the line. From the very perverse exhibitionist train sex videos, to the rampant use of sex toys, Japanese porn shows exactly the sort of repressed sexuality an entire nation possesses. No other nation has produced porn so influential that it is copied by every other porn producing country in the world. It is hard to watch a porn video these days that goes on without the least bit of Japanese influence.

Japanese porn is the ultimate outlet for those who has ever wanted to explore the most taboo, and Japanese porn indeed is the best in the world. If the nation of Japan truly has anything to be proud of, and they do, it is their unsung hero. The medium of pornography. Thank you Japan for some of the truly best sex videos!