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What is a black porn breakfast? If you check out the soon to open restaurant in Europe, you’d discover that it’s a large blackened sausage with two eggs. That is the type of food one could expect when walking into the Porn Table.

The Porn Table is the brain child of two retired porn stars who had settled down in Europe. Being able to save enough money, the couple had decided to put up a business that they believe would be beneficial and fun. Jack Spurts and Dinah Deepthroat came up with the idea of a porn themed restaurant after dining out at a famous Hollywood themed restaurant and found it tacky. “There is nothing long lasting about the novelty of film props” said Spurts. “Porn memorabilia is much more fun.”

The restaurant will feature several larger than life posters of their favorite porn stars, as well as memorabilia from their favorite porn movies. The staff will be decked out in fan favorite porn costumes, from school girl outfits to latex BDSM get ups. The food is of top notch quality, and the menu will not surprisingly center around meat products. Aside from the black porn breakfast, customers can also expect various steaks and burgers with a naughty twist.

The dishes were Deepthroat’s idea, who always had a knack for cooking and grilling. “My latest creation is the Bukkake Burger. It’s this thick, double patty burger slathered in white cream. My husband says it looks kinda weird, but everyone who’s had a taste would tell you it’s delicious!”

There is also an abnormally large number of sausages in The Porn Table’s menu. “Well, you can’t have a porn themed restaurant without sausage, right? We have all kinds with different shapes and sizes.” Dinah happily bites into one as she finishes that statement.

To complete the genuine porn experience, the chairs and tables are customized to have that casting room feel. There are even vibrating chairs for the ladies. Spurts believes that the restaurant would be a big hit. “This is the one place where anyone can come over, have a nice meal, and just be themselves. There are no judgments, and we don’t discriminate in The Porn Table. Everyone over 18 is welcome to enjoy fine food and an unforgettable experience. I encourage everyone to drop by and have a taste of my wife’s hairy meat pie. It’s one of our specials.”

Forget Batman, or Superman, or Spider-man or Iron Man. When you get down and talk to the most popular male stars of black porn, they’ll tell you the Luke Cage is the best superhero out there. A recent survey has confirmed this fact.

While Luke Cage has not enjoyed the same amount of mainstream popularity like his fellow Avengers teammates, Cage has been turning heads in the comic book world since the 1970s. Initially known as Power Man, the Hero for Hire, Cage paraded around in a loose yellow top and a tiara and afro, making him somewhat a byproduct of blaxploitation.

As the years went by, however, Cage proved to be a deep and interesting character, and his inevitable partnership with Iron Fist (a pairing so popular they had their own comic book series entitled Power Man and Iron Fist) Cage was a B-level character that seemed ready to be put on the A list. When Brian Michael Bendis pretty much took over all of Marvel comics’ writing responsibilities, he tapped Luke Cage’s potential, putting him alongside Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, and at the center of every important storyline since.

When asked about the reason behind finding Luke Cage to be their favorite superhero, the adult stars insisted that it went beyond the color of skin. “Of course, having a black superhero throwing down with Skrulls alongside Captain America is something that’s really cool, but everyone forgets that we already have the Falcon to play that part. Luke Cage is his own man.”

Another star offered insight: “Cage is just different from most of them. He got shit on a lot for wearing that stupid costume back then, but these days, he’s all about the street clothes. He’s got the respect of his ‘hood, the community he strives to protect and keep safe. The way he’s presented, it’s like he wouldn’t do anything differently even if he didn’t have invulnerable skin and super strength. That’s just the type of guy he is.”

Other honorable mentions among the survey include Batman, The Green Lantern, Steel, Deadpool, and Aquaman. For some reason, the majority of them don’t care much for Wolverine. “There’s nothing impressive about a guy with indestructible bones and a healing factor. Without all of that shit, he was a pussy!”

The recent survey was conducted by researchers in an attempt to breakdown the mentality and demographic of avid comic book readers.