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Incarcerated Bums Choose Best Pay Porn Sites

Prisoners that are on their best behavior get to avail of one of the biggest perks offered to behaved convicts. They get to sample a bunch of best pay porn sites as part of the annual survey for the annual Porn Site Recognition Night. Many of the prisoners have displayed nothing but excitement towards the announcement and many officials have noted a great change in atmosphere within the prison.

Warden Jack Dempsey offers an observation. “Everyone’s been on their best behavior. Eve our usual trouble makers have been putting their best foot forward just to get a chance to enjoy porn. And I don’t blame them. I can’t even afford membership to such sites on my salary, plus my damned alimony, and then you have these prisoners getting a chance to view the best porn in the world. I gotta tell you, everyone’s walking around like it’s fucking Christmas. It’s wonderful. It’s even starting to become a pleasant working environment. I hope they have this all year long.”

Convicted robber Ernest Fitzgerald, known around the cell block as “Fingers” Fitzgerald, personally can’t wait. “I have been on my best behavior since I was sentenced to stay here. While me being a good prisoner helps with my chances of parole is great and all that, it’s nice that there is something to actually look forward to. We convicts are not going to come out and say that we’re saints and we’ve worked very hard to get where we are, cause we’re not and we don’t, but it still feels nice to have something to break the monotony here. I know a good number of us don’t even deserve any form of privileges, but I’m happy that they give us these opportunities. It’s nice to be counted on something positive and being rewarded for doing good. It helps with the rehabilitation process, you know?”

There are some sectors from both sides of the justice system who are vehemently against this contest. But these naysayers have been more or less drowned out by the vast majority who are in favor of using prisoners as part of the judging system. “It just goes to show that anyone can be properly motivated to aspire for something better than what they currently have, that doing things the right way can be just as rewarding.” Warden Dempsey claims that the future seems brighter for all of his inmates.

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